Thursday, April 1, 2010

Ferris' Oyster Bar | 536 Yates | 250.360.1824 (SPECIAL 100th REVIEW 200th POST BONANZA!)

Half-Pound Burger
(add $1 each for cheese and bacon)

WELL WELL WELL. It would appear we have some milestones on our hands! Not only is the Ferris' burger the 100th burger the blog has reviewed; this is also our 200th post, and we recently passed 100, 000 page views! Yes, we are truly rocketing into our third year of existence with astonishing aplomb. Just check out that homemade t-shirt that says "Keep it 100 Y'all" with 100 spelled out in burgers! THE TRILLEST BURGER BLOG ON THE INTERNET. Yep, that's us. Now let's get on with this review shall we? I'm going to start with a piss story.

So I'm pretty sure a friend of mine had a big part in our fair city's decision to install all those galactic looking urinals all over downtown. Please indulge me as I share with you this stunning folk tale.

So a few years back this buddy of mine was a complete raving alcoholic. Like really bad. Like comically falling over fences, end zone spiking cellphones in fits of frustration, and suicide attempts bad. So anyway; one night he's downtown, all fucked up, and he has to take a piss. He's on Yates Street, but he probably really has no fucking clue where he is—so he enters what he thinks is the alcove of a closed business. Unfortunately for him though, this business is very much open, very much has customers inside eating dinner, and very much has a bit of a gap underneath its door. He is pissing outside the doorway to Ferris'.

As the processed 5 Star Whisky exits his body it begins to enter Ferris' and a large pool of piss starts to creep towards the feet of restaurant patrons. Eventually someone comes out and asks him what the fuck he is doing. Recognizing he has just taken a nice long piss on the floor of a busy restaurant, my friend is mortified and offers to mop up. So, all fucked up, he grabs a mop and starts cleaning up his own piss from the floor of Ferris'. And this, I believe, is why we now have downtown street urinals.

But what does this have to do with burgers? Absolutely nothing, but this is our 200th post... so we've gotta whoop it up right? Anyway, let's talk about this burger now.

It used to be Ferris' was just about always mentioned in the same breath as 5th Street whenever you asked for a burger recommendation in Victoria, but not so much anymore. I don't know if this is simply because burger culture has evolved rapidly in Victoria over the last five years, or because for a period of time Ferris' was pitching out some really dry boring patties. The last couple of times I've dined here I've been REALLY underwhelmed by the burger, but I'm happy to say the ship appears to be righting itself.

Yes the flowery shaped sesame seed kaiser (which is new I think) is rather unwieldy, and a bad match for this burger, but the rest of the package works. The half-pound patty may not be dripping with juices, but it isn't shriveled and dry either. The seasoning is simple, probably nothing more than a little salt and pepper, and the flavour of the beef is on-par with what a good burger should be. The flame-cooked nature doesn't hurt anything either.

The general construction is classic (though variations are available): house mayo, burger relish, red onion etc. compliment the package well and keep everything in balance. This burger didn't get my endorphins running like another, much greasier number did later in the night, but it still pleased me. I wish I had more to say, but that's it really. Good ingredients make a good burger. The bun doesn't work, but otherwise this is still an above average offering for our city.

VERDICT: Within the top thirty percentile I suppose.

1 comment:

The Cornichon said...

Your buddy didn't offer to clean up his piss. The server chased him across the street to lucky bar and got the bouncer to go in and bring him out. The bouncer then informed your piss head buddy to clean his piss up or he wasn't getting back in. On another note the burgers at Ferris are one the best in the city!