Ordering a burger can be a dangerous proposition—especially if you have a homicidal husband. Order it open face and that crazy motherfucker is gonna rip your cheeks off and run away with his mistress while your heart bleeds an untrue love out of your mangled mug. Oh you order with diced pickles? Make sure you hide the knives from your murderous man! What about smothered in onions... well let's go to the tape shall we?
Click the old play button down below this paragraph to enjoy all mentions of burgers from the September 12, 1949 episode of the radio serial "Murder By Experts". To listen to everything in context, go to this link and listen to the episode entitled "I Dreampt I Died". I won't spoil the story for you, but I will say again... burger buyer beware when dining out with a batshit insane adulterer.